What are Avoidance Habits?

Feeling-Avoidance Habits are coping mechanism to avoid dealing with unpleasant feelings or stressors.

Feeling-avoidance habits are often unconscious; you become so used to them you don’t know you’re doing them. But these habits are your first clue that you are having feelings. This is why you want to identify your avoidance habits.

Types of Avoidance Behaviors

  • Defensive Behaviors:
    • being aggressive, domineering, or righteous, explaining, justifying, talking down, acting “better than you,” exhibiting hubris or grandiosity, needing to be right, needing to win, jealousy, exhibitionism
  • Addictive Behaviors:
    • drinking or drugging, gambling, shopping, cleaning, eating, smoking, having compulsive sex, gaming, shopping, social media, working
  • Immature Behaviors:
    • pouting, throwing tantrums, pulling attitudes, being passive-aggressive, giving tit for tat, getting revenge, blaming, mean teasing, bullying, stonewalling, holding a grudge
  • Rationalizing Behaviors:
    • denying, downplaying, making something “okay” in your mind, explaining away
  • Self-harm Behaviors:
    • self-mutilating, scratching, cutting, burning, starving, binging and purging
  • Risky Behaviors:
    • thrill seeking, excitement seeking, impulsivity
  • Miscellaneous Behaviors:
    • starting new projects, constantly seeking to be the center of attention, creating drama, creating chaos, shutting down, playing with your phone

Your avoidance habits are indicators that something may be bothering you. Sometimes you get so busy with life you don’t realize something is bothering you. When you learn your avoidance habits, you can recognize them when they pop up and know it’s a sign to stop and reflect. At that point take a few moments to check in and ask: Am I avoiding something? Am I having feelings? Is something bothering me? Then pause, breathe, and feel.


If you would like to see if you are using feeling avoidance behaviors avoid feelings such as shame. and how that impact your life. Let’s talk. Click here to book a call www.shamehack.com/contact


Shame is NOT a life sentence, so free yourself.